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01/08/2004
how_i_feel_about_my_re.xls
I want to be fair.
My feelings about my reproductive endocrinologist are occasionally quite negative. But I swear it isn't personal.
In fact, on a personal level, I'm crazy about him. He's a lovely man who's shown me great kindness on many occasions, the sort of kindness I needed when everything went haywire: laughing dutifully at my feeble attempts at humor when most people would have been horrified. He has never shied away from the questions, complaints, and occasional abuse with which I've ambushed him. Although some of the decisions that have been made about my treatment have turned out very badly, I can't doubt the purity of his motives or the goodness of his intentions.
Based on a careful study of my journal entries (and recollection of a very few bizarre and smoking-hot dreams), I've concluded that the spikes of annoyance I've experienced over the last few months are really nothing personal. I've found that the intensity of my feelings correlates directly with the success of a given phase of treatment.
Thanks to the magic of Microsoft, I have prepared a chart that proves this, including several important milestones over the last two years. I feel it's quite persuasive.
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Oh, Julie, I can't stop laughing. Ow, my stomach hurts. You are mighty talented with them graphics.
You're too freakin' much!! That chart not only involved ingenuity, but a genuine disregard for time spent on silly projects!! I love it! You're the queen of the island I aspire to live on!
All hail the queen!
PS - I'm thinking of adapting your chart for use with my own RE as I progress into this unknown territory.
That chart is a BEAUTIFUL thing! I think they need to include blanks in all of those fertility books!
This chart MUST go into the book that you and getupgrrl write.
I look forward to the Powerpoint slide presentation, next time.
I've never wheezed so much at my computer, thank God no one is around to hear me - they'd pass me an inhaler, for sure.
This tears it. I couldn't bear to attempt a blog of my own; it could never, ever measure up to my ideal, which is right here. Bless you for your brilliance!!!
Mollie, noooooooo! I've been meaning to beg you to start a blog. Please!
Julia, no task is too silly to merit several hours of my careful attention. These days I have nothing but time on my hands, and a vast arsenal of hokey business-related clip-art.
Good lord, I'm faint with the flattery. I'm still not convinced, though. Maybe if you were here to walk me through it, help me with the layout, cut my meat into little pieces....
Flowers, candy, unremitting oral sex. Whatever it takes.
Seriously, I get such pleasure out of communing with my fellow cranks here and on their blogs that I think everyone who's smart, funny, barren, or any combination thereof should rush right out and start one up. Let a hundred goddamn flowers bloom, you know?
Damn. I knew I should've held out for the unremitting oral sex. I just didn't hold out long enough.
Okay. I like orchids, milk chocolate pecan turtles, and hey – was that you in my progesterone-induced lesbian dream the other night? Must have been, because man, was it unrelenting!! Yee-haw.
Well, I have to say, I've become quite the blog addict, and, judgemental bitch that I am, conoisseur (sp? I took Spanish, not French) as well, and I have to say that these here first blogs I ever read with any frequency turn out to be the cream of the crop. So if I ever do endeavor the form, I've got a couple of really primo role models to emulate.
I feel like Britney Spears, getting a pat on the behind from Madonna. Like, Oh my gawd, I'm, like, your biggest fan!!
i just wanted to say hi. i stumbled upon your blog a few weeks ago and i have found it to be very comforting. i've lost two babies in the last year and can relate to a lot of the things you are posting about.
Hi, Susannah. I'm so sorry for your losses I hope you're doing okay. The only way I know how to get through it is by cackling like a madwoman. And biting my cuticles until they bleed. And, uh, spending way too much time building slick-looking graphs and charts.
hey, haven't I seen that chart somewhere before? or does it just seem like it?
I don't think so maybe you're just hypnotized by the grinning businessmen.
I can't see the chart! I only see one edge of it... I want to see the whole thing -- though I think I may die laughing.