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05/07/2004
Sweets for the suite
Perhaps you will enjoy a short tour of my home away from home. I'm staying in what's called a junior suite — a large room with a queen-sized bed, a fold-out sofa, and a full kitchen. There's a table with three chairs where I can enjoy a tasty snack, and a bathroom with all the amenities where I can enjoy, well, all the amenities (or could, if the drugs didn't carry the unfortunate side effect of epic constipation).
This is my desk, equipped with laptop, beverage, medical records (for those spur-of-the-moment urges to rifle frantically through the highs and lows of the last year, which arise more frequently than I care to admit), picture of Paul, and a large bag of chocolates.
The chocolates come courtesy of Brenda, who is starting stims herself, and therefore knows what a girl needs. In her staggering generosity, Brenda sent not only the chocolates, which are emitting an aroma so seductive I'm getting a little high just sitting near them, but some leftover medication. A heartfelt and public thank you.
Now on to the bathroom. The imperial Chinese had their Forest of Pencils; I have my Thicket of Needles. (Why do I do this, these little asides? You'd almost think I wanted unsuspecting searchers to stumble across this page in their quest for information about Confucian attitudes toward learning. Won't they be just tickled?)
Here are the contents of my refrigerator. Caffeine-free Diet Pepsi, mousse truffée, a couple of raw milk cheeses (take that, immune system!), a container of lobster salad (one of the many culinary delights I miss on a daily basis), and lots and lots of drugs.
I am equipped to put on one hell of a cocktail party — I am showing promise as a budding mixologist, as long as your drink of choice is Diet Pepsi with a Follistim chaser.
Comments (19)
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It looks very cozy.
Your fridge looks like mine at home, which is kind of sad. For me.
What are you going to do with yourself for two weeks? Besides cooter visits and shooting up?
Uncle Sam cereal and flax seed oil capsules (2 a day). That'll take care of your constipation problem.
Your hotel room is probably bigger than my apartment. It's certainly cleaner.
It looks very hip-girl-in-the-city, sort of like an apartment that Mary Tyler Moore might share with Rhoda. If both were IVF patients, I mean.
If I were there with you, I'd whip you up my famous Lipton Cup-O-Soup - perfect for those rainy hotel mornings - and then I'd entertain you with my boring stories. And then I'd ask the hotel cleaning woman if she'd be willing to be an egg donor, and then you'd have to make me sit in the bathroom in a time-out.
Come to think of it, maybe it's better that I'm not there.
By the way - and here comes the stupid question from the computer moron - how can you get online in a hotel room?
Just thinking ahead ....
It's a good thing your maid knew "you come for baby", or else she'd think you were a junkie with a hankerin for chocolate and cheese.
hmmmmmmmm.... are my drugs suppose to be in the fridge? Lupron is... but nothing else. Must check that out.
You're very welome for the drugs and chocolate. Damn skippy I know what a overly hormonal woman needs to survive in the city. If you ever got mugged you could always negotiate with the person.. "look Mr Mugger, (us southern girls are polite, you know), See this little amp of powder, you can sniff that, and your woman will be all over you like poop on a pig. The only problem is you might grow boobs, but hey.. that's more for her to hang on to, right?"
Thinking of you. Hoping the time goes quickly. Love, S.
Aw, gee, thanks for the visuals. I feel like I'm right there with you! Wish I could be. I'd bring my Deluxe Anniversary Edition Scrabble® board and give you a good shellacking.
Have fun. If you're anywhere near the 30's and 7th, go to the fabric and trim stores for me. Ahhh, heaven.
xoxoxo
Oh, and for constipation, let me just plug my favorite drug: Miralax. I love it so. May even have to write a cheer. I've been taking it for months, so it's safe and effective (yikes, can't believe I just paired those words). Try it out, I mean it. Get one of your assorted and sundry doctor-types to cut you a scrip for it. I can't believe how it's changed my life.
M--I--R--A--L--A--X!
'Cause a decent dump is better than SEX!
Try this magical miracle powder
And see if YOU don't SHOUT a bit LOUDER!!
Shitting grapes?
Lay some CABLE!
Strain no more!
Be smooth and ABLE!
Bloated? Gassy? Crampy? Cross?
Let me tell you who's the boss...
MIRALAX! MIRALAX! HIP HOORAY!
Get some and you'll proudly say,
"I TOOK A DECENT CRAP TODAY!!"
YAAAAAAAAYY!!!!!
Can you tell I'm excited?
Grrl, ethernet jacks in fancy-shamnzy hotel rooms are now the new "it" thing.
Yeah, I puzzled over what that little black box in my hotel room was for a good 10 minutes before the husband took pity.
Go Julie Go!!!
m
Swanky digs, Julie! Very nice, very nice.
And Mollie, I am in awe. You so kick the ass of the Doxidan writing team, who in the mid-'80s produced a keychain I wish I still had:
(front)
"Doxidan in the PM for a BM in the AM!"
(back)
"Doxidan did it!" (big smiley)
Yum! Save some of that chocolate-minibar delites for me. When's your next follicle scan? I'll be there Sunday and Tuesday. I don't know what you look like, so if you see me, come over and accost. Nice suite, by the way. I love hotel rooms. I have this weird thing for them. It's somewhat of an obsession.
Okay, recently, I've noticed a trend. I tend to be the last one to post. This happens on Jo's blog, too. What the hell? I say something and all of you yappermouths stop chatting? ;) come on, don't make me be the last one again. Sometimes I actually check your site, Julie, five times an hour so that I can be sure to get there before all the juicy discussion winds down.
I'll go last just for you, Karen.
Your suite looks wonderfully comfy and well-equipped. The only thing you are missing is a stack of Sopranos DVDs. Nothing like watching Tony whack somebody to take the edge off of a hormonal rage.
best of luck, crossing my tubes for ya!
Good luck, Julie.
I've been taking two metamucil tablets each morning and it does wonders! No more home thrown syndrome!
Karen, I thought it was ME who was the last post-er?? It sure seems like that. Watch. I bet no one posts after me. Maybe we're sharing the duty?
Julie, all the best babe. You suite looks nice.(But I'm betting right about now you were wishing you could have smuggled in Follistim kitty, huh?)
I hope that no cyst has reared its ugly.painful. head for you. I'm frankly terrified about two things.....
1. that this excruciating pain in the region of my left ovary is NOT a cyst about to fuck up my new IVF cycle round about the 20th.
2. that my stupid sever sinus infection that has laid me low for about 5 days now will have cleared up by the time AF shows up.
I lied. Make that 3 things....
3. That when I go to the doc tomorrow-ish for the pre-cycle USound that he will NOT say Hmmmmmmm. mmmmmmm, and give me the look that says that I am not paranoid and was right on the money with comment 1. Because yesterday morning at 4am, I was doubled over in excruciating pain from left ovary,whimpering like a kicked puppy, praying that it is just the damn cyst dissolving.
Whats the story with you and your ovaries, sista??
Ahem, I meant SEVERE sinus infection. See? I told you I was sick.
Sorry about that....although sever is what I'd like to do to my sinuses right now.
My, those curtains bring back memories. I kept my needles on the desk.
Wishng you dozens of gorgeous ripe follicles all the same size!
Ha! not the last.
Oh shit.