Disappeared

Subject	Crime	Last seen	Suspected fate
AFLAC duck	Fomenting naptime rebellion	Top shelf of closet	Violent and forcible extraction of viscera and/or batteries
8 jumbo washable Crayola crayons	Attempted poisoning	Clenched in enpurpled front teeth, crumbled within bottom molars	Exiled to kitchen junk drawer next to decaying rubber band ball
Talking Barney phone	Repeated violation of gag order	Wedged somewhere under the car seat, whence occasionally comes a sprightly little tune and a goofy enjoinder to use your inside voice while talking on the phone	Vaporized and subsequently classified an untoy
Fanna benake, AKA flannel blanket, AKA I know, bunny, it's sad, but flannel blanket stays in your room	Gross imposition	Foundering in the depths of the laundry basket after being clutched prematurely to naked loins during a diaper change	Drowning (heavy wash, hot, extra rinse, maximum extract)
Stout and pointy stick found on playground	Attempted boyslaughter	Wrested from small sweaty fist in consequence of strict official warnings that we only play with sticks while we're sitting down, indignant cries of protest ignored, and eventually flung into a dark clump of junipers while its intended victim was busy with his Snack Trap, in accordance with Ambulatory Equipment Code § VI Paragraph 3 Subsection A2	Squirrels, ravening

 

Posted by Julie at 09:42:57 AM in Charles in charge

Comments

Disappeared

Subject	Crime	Last seen	Suspected fate
AFLAC duck	Fomenting naptime rebellion	Top shelf of closet	Violent and forcible extraction of viscera and/or batteries
8 jumbo washable Crayola crayons	Attempted poisoning	Clenched in enpurpled front teeth, crumbled within bottom molars	Exiled to kitchen junk drawer next to decaying rubber band ball
Talking Barney phone	Repeated violation of gag order	Wedged somewhere under the car seat, whence occasionally comes a sprightly little tune and a goofy enjoinder to use your inside voice while talking on the phone	Vaporized and subsequently classified an untoy
Fanna benake, AKA flannel blanket, AKA I know, bunny, it's sad, but flannel blanket stays in your room	Gross imposition	Foundering in the depths of the laundry basket after being clutched prematurely to naked loins during a diaper change	Drowning (heavy wash, hot, extra rinse, maximum extract)
Stout and pointy stick found on playground	Attempted boyslaughter	Wrested from small sweaty fist in consequence of strict official warnings that we only play with sticks while we're sitting down, indignant cries of protest ignored, and eventually flung into a dark clump of junipers while its intended victim was busy with his Snack Trap, in accordance with Ambulatory Equipment Code § VI Paragraph 3 Subsection A2	Squirrels, ravening