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Haiku! (Gesundheit.)

Limber up those fingers, people, and get ready to count some syllables: It's time for the First Annual Infertility Haiku Competition!

Crimson droplets fall
Mournful autumn, maple leaves,
Days before beta

My Fertility Plan is sponsoring a contest to celebrate the many ways infertiles cope with their family-building challenges...

Ominous gray clouds
Smudged on the ultrasound screen:
Follicles collapse

...with real cash prizes and everything!

Cervical mucus
Gleams with promise, dreams stretched thin,
Wishful strings of snot

Entries must relate in some way to your infertility experience, and must conform to the traditional 5-7-5 convention.

Two pink lines or one?
Urine ripples, surging wish...
One.  Fuck and alas.

There are two categories, serious and silly, and, hey, even a special award for medication-related haiku!  (Hint: gonadotropin, five syllables.  Recombinant FSH, seven.)

"Why no children yet?"
Imagine this ass, like yours,
Stabbed with 18-gauge.

Enter as many times as you like — it's free — between now and noon ET on Monday, November 24.  I'm one of the judges...

Supplementing hope,
Enveloped so securely:

...and I very much look forward to reading your moving, funny, and brilliant creations.


Cycle day thirteen
Winter's quiet cold descends:
Ovary forlorn

Get the full details here, and submit your entries by visiting My Fertility Plan and clicking on "Contact Us."  (Send each entry separately, and don't forget to include your name and e-mail address.)

"It's a numbers game,"
Says the doctor, unconcerned.
Christ, what an asshole.