« Help an infertile out. Uh, but not like Carolyn Savage did. | Main | It's probably a good thing I don't do book reviews »
09/28/2009
Whip smart
I should tell you it didn't bother me, the misspelling on Ben's note. When I read Amy's comment — "Luckily even dumb people still manage to take decent care of our children!" — I had a frantic moment where I thought, Whoa, I hope it didn't seem like I thought...
And then I got caught up in armchair stirrup-straddling for a few days, thinking of the Savages and my poor devastated friend — thank you for your kind words and advice for her — and I forgot that I'd wanted to tell you that "whips" didn't bother me at all.
Although I'd shudder if a teacher of academics made such an error, and am steeling myself for the inevitable day when Charlie brings home a note describing the punctilious little lecture he gave his English teacher on the difference between plurals and possessives — "Your requested to quash you're son's incipient priggishness soonest," like, ooooh, nice passive voice there, lady — I'm not especially concerned that a teacher of not biting people did. Precision will be necessary later. Right now warmth and kindness are more important.
The people at day care are lovely. The strangers we're paying to raise our children really care about our kids, clerical errors notwithstanding. They've helped us foster the best in Charlie, and they've helped us identify — oh, let's not say the worst. Let's not say his flaws. Let's say the areas in which he could use some improvement if I am to stay out of the fucking crazy house. I think that's a particularly fine gift, because I have every parental blind spot listed in The Great Big Illustrated Encyclopedia of Super Special Snowflakes, Selfish IVFer Edition, and I appreciate the perspective they offer. If I have deep knowledge of two particular children, they have broad experience with many, and I'm really glad we can work together on, you know, getting him not to lay snares for his enemies. At least not obvious ones. And based on what I've seen so far, I expect the same will be true of Ben.
Who incidentally is walking now! And grinning and clapping his hands while he does it.
I guess the whips are working.
Posted by Julie at 11:34 PM in Ben there, done that | Permalink
Comments (67)
Who is this "8 step" kid and what is this "tody" Ben stole from her?
Sorry. I'm an asshole.
Posted by: Orange at Sep 28, 2009 11:49:31 PM
Walking? WALKING?? WTF?
Posted by: CharmingBitch at Sep 29, 2009 12:28:44 AM
Whoa. As an English Instructor/Tutor by trade and a Grammar-Nazi by way of FUN, this note has me reeling. But considering that the stranger I'm paying to raise my child can hardly get his name right (it's Liam, but in the Deep South, it turns into "Lem," spelling and all), I can appreciate that at least you're getting legible notes, even if they're not punctuated or spelled correctly.
Posted by: clarabella at Sep 29, 2009 12:29:22 AM
My son's childcare workers were often from somewhere other than the US. They were quite smart, but their English spelling was not perfect, though it certainly was better than my spelling would be in Tamil or Urdu or any of the other languages they spoke.
But their mistakes were never quite as funny as "whips"!
Posted by: Channa at Sep 29, 2009 2:27:47 AM
Aah, I just *now* figured out the first note was asking for wipes, not whips, so I'm not in any position to cast aspersions on the intelligence of your day-care provider.
Posted by: Nony Mouse at Sep 29, 2009 2:28:46 AM
Orange whip. Orange whip. Orange whip.
Posted by: Rayne of terror at Sep 29, 2009 4:36:32 AM
Only 4 more steps and he completes his program!
Posted by: Judy at Sep 29, 2009 6:09:32 AM
I didn't even GET that that was meant tovsay wipes until right now. I thought you'd written whips as a joke I didn't get! If I'd gotten that note I wouldn't have known WTH they were talking about. Gatito's teachers at two different preschools have been really bad communicators. Never mind the misspellings, they fail to get their points across. It's a pain because I always have to follow up to find out what they really meant or else get it wrong.
Posted by: Cat at Sep 29, 2009 6:57:13 AM
Lol, I think most parents have blind spots when it comes to their children. Congrats on Ben walking. How do they get so big so fast?
Posted by: Cookie at Sep 29, 2009 7:25:11 AM
Julie. In total agreement. I would rather my childrens daycare teachers love them and know that they are HAPPY when they see their face everyday than any spelling error.
Posted by: Amanda at Sep 29, 2009 7:36:50 AM
Julie. In total agreement. I would rather my childrens daycare teachers love them and know that they are HAPPY when they see their face everyday than any spelling error.
Posted by: Amanda at Sep 29, 2009 7:36:51 AM
I agree as well--even though I'm a stickler for proper puncuation and spelling.
However, I thought it was a joke! I thought you wrote it in, as if the only way the teachers could keep toddlers in line was with whips. (Yes, I guess I have a dark sense of humor.) Still, warm and caring teachers wins every time at this age.
Posted by: Galyn at Sep 29, 2009 8:00:11 AM
I would just assume that when you're chasing after a good handful of rugrats (who are now walking!), the time to jot down legible and well thought out notes is slim. I'm the first to ridicule when I see someone use the wrong "their" or "it's"...but I've reread e-mails before sending and seen that my own fingers were not necessarily connected to my brain. I would guess in a daycare that proofreading time is short.
Posted by: books at Sep 29, 2009 8:07:55 AM
Judy wins this thread.
Posted by: Orange at Sep 29, 2009 8:31:11 AM
I'm sort of charmed by the vision of the staff rushing around writing out all these little notes at the end of the day. And when I consider my typo ratio in comment boxes, I'm more than happy to cut them some slack.
Ben's walking! Woot!
Posted by: Jody at Sep 29, 2009 8:38:31 AM
My husband and I had a similar revelation when my eldest was younger and her teacher was...less than smart...but my daughter LOVED her and the lady seemed to have a real way with kids. And eventually I stopped flinching every time I read her note.
And as a side note, I totally translated the whips into wipes because that is a skill you learn with daycare notes - translation.
And I can't believe he's mobile!
Posted by: choosy at Sep 29, 2009 9:04:02 AM
I'm with you.
But then again, my son's 4th grade teacher sent home a weekly newsletter where she said they "could of done" something and I died a little inside.
Posted by: Lisa at Sep 29, 2009 9:08:29 AM
Judy stole my comment!
I also agree with Books - who has time to worry about spelling when you're chasing toddlers? But, whips was funny - I would have gotten a good laugh out of that if it came home on my daughter's daily sheet.
Posted by: a at Sep 29, 2009 9:15:23 AM
Well, if it makes you feel better, I only just now GOT that it was a misspelling. I just thought she was a smart ass, and that it must be so pleasant to have such amusing day care workers. Shows what I know.
Posted by: Alexa at Sep 29, 2009 9:28:55 AM
It could be worse -- my friends' son once came home with a note requesting that he bring something starting with the letter G tomorrow. Then, helpfully, they listed some suggestions.
Gel
Gloss (as in lip gloss)
Grape lip balm
Gillette razor
Grout
Green
It was awesome and horrifying all at once.
Posted by: txmama at Sep 29, 2009 9:45:23 AM
I just have to pipe up from the other side here! As a preschool teacher who has written many legible, articulate, grammatically correct notes that went completely unread, disregarded, and ignored by parents ::grrr::: I am pleased so many parents out here actually READ the notes their kids bring home enough to notice the spelling errors.
And OMG. A razor??? Seriously? Razor starts with R, it's completely inappropriate ;)
Posted by: Devon at Sep 29, 2009 10:04:40 AM
LOL @ Judy and txmama!!
I'm with you on daycare- I'd rather my son (about Ben's age) be in a place where he's cared about and happy right now. Spelling can come later... you know, after he can say more words than "Ball? Ball. Ball! BALL!!"
Posted by: Cat at Sep 29, 2009 10:05:23 AM
My daughter's daycare merged with a preschool the first year I sent her, and there was a mass exodus of parents when the lovey-dovey caregivers were pushed aside for "teachers" with degrees in either education or child development. At the time I couldn't understand why anyone would object to a a little more professionalism and a no-pressure curriculum for toddlers, but I can understand their fears now. My daughter's been lucky to have caregivers who were both affectionate and able to spell, but let's face it, if the notes they sent home were riddled with grammatical errors, I'd be the only one put out.
Posted by: Eliz at Sep 29, 2009 10:05:31 AM
Judy, Judy, Judy!
Last year, I was just itching to send a year's supply of my son's kindergarten teacher's take-home notes, corrected in red pen, to her principal.
I suppose I could overlook the day care providers' errors, but if they have degrees in early childhood ed, I think they should know how to pluralize properly.
Posted by: Denise at Sep 29, 2009 10:09:10 AM
We had our son at a day care/school/whatever place and on our "what I did today" slip she wrote: "Spelling words: pumkin"
Yeeaaah. He didn't stay there too long.
Posted by: sheilah at Sep 29, 2009 10:21:54 AM
My first thought was what Orange wrote - I'm a smart ass like that, but then Judy took me with her comment.
I'm still laughing a while after reading, so came back to "highlight" their contribution to my fun.
Ben is WALKING? Holy crap. Winter is going to be very, very long, isn't it? ;)
Posted by: Boulder at Sep 29, 2009 10:45:44 AM
Am I the only one who thinks it is ridiculous to label a person "dumb" based on spelling error?
It's one thing to think our children are special snowflakes but can any of the adults here truly say if they were taking care of a group of toddlers and filling out forms that there would be no "clerical errors?"
Good grief.
Posted by: Kathleen at Sep 29, 2009 10:52:34 AM
...Nnno, you're not the only one. In fact, that was kind of the point of my post.
Posted by: Julie at Sep 29, 2009 11:03:21 AM
It drives me nuts when my son's artwork is sent home from preschool with his name, carefully written by the teachers, spelled wrong.
His name is Jonah. His drawings have come back with both Johna and Jonha, which I like to pronounce "John, A" and "Jon, Ha!" respectively.
I mean, shouldn't they at least spell his NAME correctly? Otherwise, whips or wipes, I could not care less.
Posted by: Laserbabe at Sep 29, 2009 11:07:53 AM
I worked at a school (I taught second grade) where the kindergarten teacher used to have me proofread all the notes she sent home to the parents and I caught horrible grammar and spelling mistakes. But she was a wonderful, fantastic kindergarten teacher and I would loved to have had her as my kid's teacher.
Besides, who hasn't misspelled something? Especially when you are writing with your other hand, holding a toddler under one arm, and have playdoh in your eyes. When I worked at daycare, we just had checkboxes for things like wipes. ;)
Posted by: HereWeGoAJen at Sep 29, 2009 11:15:17 AM
I hadn't read the 'whips' note - it's my first time to your blog (love it, by the way) - so this was an interesting puzzle for me. What word was 'whips' actually supposed to be?! That's when I realized there was a link, but oh no, I like doing things the hard way. I have a your/you're misspelling phobia, so I applaud your acceptance of this phenomenon.
Posted by: Snotty McSnotterson at Sep 29, 2009 11:21:11 AM
Since I've worked with (and had to write papers with) PhD-level scientists who can't really spell and whose grammar skills aren't so hot... I definitely cut the day care teachers some slack. (Although being asked to bring in whips would have made me laugh, too.)
Our day care has two adults in every room. One is the "teacher" who has a degree in something relevant. The other is an aide who may or may not have some relevant classes. They've all been lovely. My daughter has really bonded with some of them, and is ecstatic when we get one of them to come babysit at night.
Posted by: Cloud at Sep 29, 2009 11:37:09 AM
I am a horrible speller. Though, I wouldn't even spell 'wipes' wrong. And not that I am brilliant but I did manage through grad school and somehow passed the bar exam. Please, please tell me that bad spellers can be smart?!!?!?!? : )
BAD SPELLERS OF THE WORLD UNTIE!!!
Posted by: christina(apronstrings) at Sep 29, 2009 11:48:04 AM
Well, you and I BOTH know that I am a total moron and without spell check, it would be MUCH more obvious. If there were a punctuation check, I would be much better off still, but to her credit, whips IS a word.
And, as I am one who will HAPPILY stand in front of the Grammar/comma/apostrophe police to be shot, take your best shot. I deserve it.
THEN, I will be off to correct your Bio-Chem test. Wait, what's that you say? We can't ALL be be smug annoying overachieving scientists, Aunt Becky? Well, we can't all remember where the hell to put a comma, either Grammar Police.
Posted by: Aunt Becky at Sep 29, 2009 11:49:45 AM
I suppose I'm with Kathleen. I get that you wrote this post intending to make the same point, Julie, but still -- I'm cringing a little at all the snickering at the expense of people who in all likelihood aren't as well educated as most of your readers and are probably less well-paid, too. There's a class dimension to this that makes it less amusing -- and pointing out that the grammar- and spelling-challenged have other immensely valuable attributes is really just adding condescension to injury. Being a grammar snob is fine, but as much as I treasure a well-placed apostrophe and a non-dangling preposition, I value kindness and good manners more, and this series of post and the comments they've attracted -- well, for me, they teeter on the brink of meanness. This isn't meant as a slam, and I hope I don't seem sanctimonious; I totally got the amusement at the "whips" (and I appreciate your flagging Amy's comment because it was really the one that made me wince), I'm just finding this... icky.
Posted by: Catherine at Sep 29, 2009 11:56:00 AM
So, I confess that when I read that post with the original note from the teacher, I didn't catch that it was supposed to be "wipes." I figured with all of your photoshop cleverness (to make a joke) you had edited the note to suggest that your child was so unwieldy that they were requesting corporal punishment tools. Yes, now I feel dumb.
Posted by: Christa at Sep 29, 2009 12:27:56 PM
I'm glad they are such wonderful care givers but I think their notes how would drive me insane.
Posted by: Kristin at Sep 29, 2009 1:24:13 PM
Kathleen and Catherine have it exactly right. And did anyone stop and think that maybe she/he had a learning disability? I am personally dyslexic and without a little program sitting my systems tray I would spell half my comments/Facebook/emails wrong. And lets not even talk about how many times I reread something I write to make sure I didn't spell a word right when I meant a totally different word. and BTW: my IQ puts me into the above average intelligence range...smarts and or learning sometimes has nothing to do with writing and or spelling. Hell, Einstein was dyslexic! *sorry. Julie I know the point was to point out not to judge by little things like that, but it totally got under my skin and I felt the need to make the additional point to your readers.*
Posted by: Rachel-G at Sep 29, 2009 1:31:06 PM
One of my good friends in high school, who was whip smart (not wipe smart, though) was a terrible speller. I used to proofread his English papers before he turned them in, and his spelling mistakes had me rolling. My favorite? Theroy (instead of theory). I thought it sounded like theory went and got an attitude! He was good-natured about my laughing, and we both knew he was smart--just not spelling smart. I think he'd appreciate whips for wipes, personally. :)
Posted by: Jennifer at Sep 29, 2009 2:07:04 PM
"The Great Big Illustrated Encyclopedia of Super Special Snowflakes, Selfish IVFer Edition"
I think I sprained something laughing at this. Thanks for writing the funniest thing I've read all week.
Posted by: Jenn at Sep 29, 2009 2:12:46 PM
Julie, My comments were not directed at you, they were directed at a few of the comments.
I find ideas such as having a degree in Early Childhood Education means never pluralizing improperly to be silly.
The overall tone of "Oh, well, it's clearly more important for day care providers to be caring than smart" based on exactly two errors to be odd and off-putting.
Posted by: Kathleen at Sep 29, 2009 2:24:31 PM
Our daycare has the word "February" spelled wrong in the toddler room. I know that the kids in that room are too young to know it's spelled wrong, but I got really irritated when I pointed it out and the lead teacher in that room laughed it off.
Posted by: stb at Sep 29, 2009 2:59:21 PM
My husband + older mothers I know all said I was being an asshole when I screened daycare applicants first on if they would properly capitalize in their emails. (Second, I ran them through the court database.) I thought I was being gracious by ignoring grammar and spelling errors. However, I've found that with the 3rd kid regarding most motherly related criteria, I've lowered the bar considerably.. If they can pass the criminal check, we're cool.
Posted by: Leah at Sep 29, 2009 3:22:25 PM
I am a bad speller. BUT I always spell check. and if i'm writing something that i expect someone else to read, i look it up or ask. It's not that i think someone who can't spell is dumb; i just think that in a professional situation, especially at a school, people should take the time to proofread so that others will have confidence in them. I think "whips" for "wipes" is a wonderful Freudian slip; but it drives me crazy when people use an apostrophe to pluralize a word. and the there/they're/their and your/you're mistakes make me even more crazy.
BTW- google chrome web browser has spell check built in. it is amazing.
Posted by: Abby at Sep 29, 2009 6:51:11 PM
I thought about 'whips' as my son's preschool teacher struggled reading a book to the kids, and as she referred to children "aksing" before they hug each other.
We are new to preschool, just 3 weeks under our belt, but I know his teacher is fabulous.
Judy, that was hysterical!
Posted by: Paz at Sep 29, 2009 10:07:10 PM
grammar police make me want to puke... did i spell that correctly?
Posted by: kris (lower case) at Sep 29, 2009 10:32:57 PM
Hooray on Ben walking!! YAY!!!
also I don't care very much about grammatical errors with my kids' daycare. As long as they are loved and well cared for I am happy. They are, and I am.
Posted by: Karissa at Sep 29, 2009 10:41:18 PM
Hey, I can spot a misplaced apostrophe at 100 paces and have been known to email in after reading articles on news sites to complain about shoddy spelling... but I have to look at my own handwriting, after 17 years of using a computer keyboard and accept that good lord, most of those squiggles have nothing to do with the word I'm writing. So yeah, getting notes like that would hurt my eyes, but I'm in no position at all to criticise. (Though I never realised it was supposed to be wipes.)
Posted by: Not My Mother at Sep 30, 2009 12:02:33 AM
"Well, we can't all remember where the hell to put a comma, either Grammar Police." haha ... Aunt Becky, I don't know if that was intentional, but well played either way.
I don't really see any reason to turn this into a class warfare thing... sometimes misspellings are funny! Like when you tell your students' moms to bring whips! You know? Jeez.
Posted by: mfk at Sep 30, 2009 12:05:33 AM
The best typo I've seen was on a resume we received for our accounting position. It said:
"I am looking for a position as a full-time beekeeper."
Good luck with that.
Sometimes spell-check is NOT your friend.
:)
Posted by: Crystal at Sep 30, 2009 3:30:13 AM
