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What not to wear

...to a meeting concerning your kindergarten son's hitting at school:

  1. Two words: Catholic schoolgirl.
  2. Two other words: Beer hat. (Via Twitter.)
  3. Arm in a sling, heavy eye makeup -- I favor Urban Decay eyeshadow in the Weeping Bruise palette -- and a few fake teeth to spit out casually during conversation.
  4. "The answer is nun. Nun more black."
  5. "I'm with Stupid --->" shirt, no matter how strategically you seat yourself in the principal's office.

(What I did wear: a matronly sweater and a shellshocked look, because oh em effing gee.)